Gonna take some time to do the things we never had

I don’t think I’m getting old, but based on the way I got out of bed this morning I think my body is telling me otherwise. This Sunday (yesterday) I played 1.5 hours of flag football on a field that was approximately the size of a tennis court. It was suggested that we expand the field, but other players were concerned that expanding the field would require moving the 9 cones we had already placed on the postage stamp we were playing on. Realizing this would require effort, it was decided that we continue to run into each other and not move the cones. I had a point here, but I seem to have forgotten it because I feel like I have internal bleeding from the game. There was very little contact, so it wasn’t like I was bruised or anything, but I think I tore something/ everything because getting out of bed took a lot of effort this morning.

Here are my main areas of concern: thighs, calves, hips, abdomen (main area of pain/ internal bleeding) shoulder and eyebrows (I also got sunburned on my face). It used to be I could play for 4 hours and feel fine the next day. What happened? I am going to chalk it up to not playing football for 3 years. Yeah, party on Wayne, party on Garth. It has only been three days since my last entry so not much has happened, oh, other than another weekend of beer pong. Now rivalries and custom tables have entered the equation, so things may get heated in the neighborhood. I will keep you posted. As far as the baby goes, Kim is getting cranky and taking it out on me, the neighbors, and the pediatricians we (she) interviewed for the right to provide remedies to our child. There have been two candidates each of which seem fine to me, especially since they are all witch doctors anyway. When asked my opinion, I said, “The closer one sounds great.” So, that decided that. According to our due date, we have nine days left. My guess is the baby will come on the 14th, because 9+14= 23 which is 4 less that my age which is 7 more than the number of bones I hurt playing football. Figure that out, calculus majors or majorettes. Oh, and we are taking Kim’s laptop into labor with us so I can give you up-to-the-hour play by plays on all the happenings of Kim’s vagine. (say it like Borat). So yeah, look forward to that. Until next time, catch some waves down in Africa.

Also: There is a new pole on the side. Take it so we can see who is right, Kim or I. Like we don’t already know the answer.

BTW: In honor of the new episode of The Hills tonight on MTV @ 10 p.m., the song of the week is Untouched by The Veronicas. The song is campy and I think it is played on Top 20 radio stations, but the girls singing it are hot, so there.