New Life of Blogging and Parenting

“Be gentle,” he said. “This is my first blog.” As he typed a cornucopia of words that made little sense, and only entertained readers for an average of 3.6 seconds. And with this it was born, the blog of one Nick G. (last name withheld) and Kim M. (last name unknown) as they entered the online world of millions typing pointless passages. So enjoy it, or don’t, I don’t care. Just don’t complain when our blog is made into a feature length film and you are still at home watching re-runs of ALF.

Want some background about us? Like you don’t already know.

Our life so far is simple. We both grew up in the suburbs of Washington, D.C. (the good ones not PG county), though we didn’t know each other for at least 14 years. We met in high school, went to college together at a major, state-funded institution where I achieved Magna Cum Laude and Kim graduated without injuring herself. We married in 200…..3? and have since moved to Cowtown, PA (not the actual name, but an accurate description). I work long hours in the somewhat dangerous field of Polar Bear Photography and Kim compliments my income by writing for the same university we graduated from.

But I digest. The point of this blog isn’t to drone on about our lackluster life thus far. It’s to document our latest accomplish of becoming pregnant (with a baby). Well, not me so much as Kim (I recently found out boys can’t have babies). Anyway being pregnant means everyone you know wants hourly updates on how things are going, and being that we both come from divorced families, and I have three friends interested in my current life, I approximate that we have 716,754,213 people to call a day. Therefore, posting our lives on the Internet is the most logical way of avoiding having to call and update many of you daily. You can just check our blog once in a while and see WHAAASSSUP (“what is happening” for those of you over 35). Besides, I don’t care for approximately 35% of you (Brandi, mostly due to the smell) so you can happily read about my life from afar and I can avoid infectious contact with you.

Here is what we know so far: Kim is due September 17th ish, and we are 87% sure the baby is mine. Though, if it comes out ugly again it is going to live with my dad. We will update the blog with pictures of Kim’s growing bump often, and we will also update the blog with pictures of her pregnant belly. (Get that one? It’s subtle I know). However, she requested no skin shots for a while, so I will instead add pictures of my bare stomach next to her clothed one for comparison. All comments are appreciated. And if you think you have to read my gibberish from now till forever, don’t worry, Kim will be posting her thoughts and updates on the blog too. Keep in mind however, that her creative juices only flow twice a moon cycle, therefore most of her posts will read more like tutorials on pregnancy, and will probably include clinical words like “gestation,” “uterus” and “gymboree.” Humor her though she e is part of this pregnancy too, a minor part, but a part nonetheless.





















I have a lot more thoughts on our current state of affairs, but I think this first entry is quite long enough already. Remember, Rule #1 in bloggerating is to keep it short enough so people don’t lose interest, but long enough to offend at least three people. I believe I have accomplished both. So…. get ready general public because if my conversations with my 5th grade buddies are accurate, in 4 months a baby will be falling out of my wife’s butt!!!